Man, 58, Dies After Having Sex with Scarecrow

(By Afarin Majidi)

According to an online newspaper, 'First To Know',  Neighbors found Jose Alberto dead after they smelled the foul odor of his body decomposing in the home where he lived alone. The 58-year-old shepherd’s body was discovered next to a scarecrow, which was dolled up with lipstick, a long wig, and a six-inch strap-on sex toy. Evidence shows Alberto had pleasured himself with the straw woman.

Prosecutors, who initially thought they’d found two bodies when they came upon the sexed-up scarecrow, said there was no evidence of violence and are working on the assumption that the man died while having sex.

Neighbors who didn’t know much about the Argentine man said that Alberto didn’t even own a cell phone and was an absolute loner. We can assume, however, that he preferred stuffy dates.

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